Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers; but his delight is in the law of the LORD, and on his law he meditates day and night.
He is like a tree, planted by streams of water and yields its fruit in its season, and its leaf does not wither. In all that he does, he prospers. Psalm 1:1-3
This week I am overwhelmed by God’s goodness. I’d mentioned before that April and May had me in a funk something terrible. Of course there are always a number of factors that play into those things, but one was the arrival of my 30th birthday. I know, I know–30 is still young, but birthdays always bring an assortment of mixed emotions, especially milestone ones. The emotion I was most clearly sensing was this: For my whole life I’ve been basically running at a sprint pace into the next “thing” to accomplish. College in three years, ministry training school, teaching, getting married, college ministry, moving to San Jose, moving back, finishing seminary, having a baby, having another baby, moving ELEVEN times, getting a job, selling two houses, buying a house, fixing up the house, starting in women’s ministry, run run run! Then all of a sudden, this June, when our schedule slowed and I sat back, I realized,
“Hm…this is it. I mean, of course I’ll keep running for Jesus, but I don’t have any big thing on the horizon to run toward, to strive after. I’m planted. Jeff’s a pastor, we have a house, we have our two kids, I’m doing women’s ministry. Really, everything we were working toward … we have. And now … I’m 30, and my roots are down. No more running. I can’t even run to Starbucks without 30 minutes prep of potty and shoes on and diaper change and carseats strapped and snacks packed and books in hands and sippy cups and AHH!! I’m planted to be sure! Stuck right down in the mud!”
Ok, I’m exaggerating, but sometimes when we’ve been running for so long, chasing after each new thing, it’s kind of a rude awakening to go, “Hm.. this is my life. And, it’s actually fairly ordinary.” And yes, I know, my whole passion in life is the sacredness of the mundane, right? Well the mundane just didn’t seem that sacred. It felt more like being planted in mud. There were even a few thorns to be quite frank with you.
So my 30th birthday came, and my amazing husband and friends truly overwhelmed me with love. I, who am never surprised by anything, was surprised over and over and over. What I thought was a “shark party” for Dutch turned out to be a family birthday party for me (complete with shark cake, check it out). The day of my birthday my best friend of 30 years (yes, we were born friends) came over for the day and brought every favorite food of mine, Izze grapefruit drinks, Food Should Taste Good chips, mango salsa, and gooey chocolate chip cookies. Then my husband surprised me by coming home early, arranging babysitting by my parents,and whisking me away for the evening. What he had done was the most amazing gift anyone’s ever given me. He created a website, for me, and had friends and family write special posts for me, for my birthday. It was unbelievable. Friends from ages ago, recent friends, family, co-workers at church … I sat there in Starbucks, sipping my decaf caramel frappucino (my birthday included a lot of calories!), and laughed until my side hurt, cried until my nose ran, shook my head in awe that my dear friends and family would take the time to encourage, love, and affirm me in that way. I was absolutely undone and overwhelmed with love.
And it showed me that roots are a beautiful thing. That being planted is the best place to be. Though all the posts were amazing to me, the ones that had me in stitches were remarkable all in the same way–they recounted innumerable memories of times shared together. Hard times, laughter, embarrassing moments, growth in godliness, epiphanies and insights, heartache and breakthrough. I was struck by the fact that most people only share those kind of memories at someone’s funeral. What a gift, an amazing gift, to get to read and revel in the joy of those memories while one is still alive!
The night finished with Jeff surprising me with an amazing Thai dinner with a few more long time friends–a guy friend of 26 years, and a girlfriend of about 22 years. Again I found myself just sitting there marveling at how rich those relationships are, those roots that go down and down and down. Roots of relationship built on Christ.
And I have new roots too, new roots in our WCC home, that I cherish and nurture and water and look forward to watching as they grow down down in Christ.
So today, in a deliriously joyful state because of the sun, I spent the afternoon working in my garden. This is my first garden that’s not in pots. I’ve only been able to plant things in pots because–surprise!–we moved so often. This is my first garden that’s not moving! It’s planted. My first snow-pea blossoms burst out in beautiful white today. The Bibb lettuce looks brilliantly green against the damp dark dirt. Roots are growing and flowers are blooming. I’m so thankful to be planted, and I pray God will help me blossom here, to bear fruit for His glory, in this season of life. I’m embracing 30, and praying that God will keep me fixated on His word, abiding in His presence, walking in His grace. Thank you so much to those of you who contributed to the precious little birthday website. You know who you are and I am overwhelmed with thankfulness that you would take the time to love me in that way.
Lord plant us. Water us. Let our roots go deep and our fruit abound, for your glory. Amen.