Being Believed In

I can point to several specific points conversations that have shaped the entire course of my life.  And I’m marveling today how influential teachers, leaders, coaches, and role models are in our lives.  I can remember, as clear as if it were yesterday, sitting across a little table in JavaStop at OSU from my Writing 224 teacher, and going over the fiction story I had written.  I was the only freshman in the class, my first semester of college, and scared out of my wits about writing for this man I considered a literary genious.  I will never forget the comments he wrote.  This is probably bad, but he wrote “*Explitive* this good!” on one portion of my paper and I will never forget that as long as I live, not because he wrote an explitive on my paper, but because I sat there in awe realizing that he really meant it.  He really meant it was good and I was shell-shocked.  He was seeing something, identifying something, calling something out that I was scared to show.  His encouragment bolstered my courage enough to keep writing.

My Honor’s English teacher, Majorie Sandor, was the one who asked me to come see her in her office, and shared with me some of the most profoundly encouraging things, urging me to pursue an English degree (I started as a Psych major) because of what she somehow saw in my writing and literary discussion.  This was another moment I will never forget–her tiny little frame and messy hair, over-sized glasses and cowl-neck sweater.  I can still smell the old books in her office.

The President of Multnomah, Dan Lockwood, sitting across the dining table at Elmer’s across from Jeff and me, sharing words of encouragement that I still keep locked in my little heart because I don’t know exactly how God will fulfill or use them.  I can still see his gentle eyes and feel the vinyl seat under my legs.

These moments are rare, I know, but when they come, they can be some of the most powerful things we will ever experience.  It’s one thing to get encouragment from a parent or spouse or close friend.  Those things are necessary and so powerful as well, but there is something about a teacher, a professor, an outside party who has no obligation to you whatsoever, nothing at all to gain by building you up (and perhaps even something to lose if you prove to be better at something than they are!), taking the time to set you aside and call out what they see in your life.  And it is even more powerful when that person actually sets aside his or her own life in order to invest in yours.

I experienced a fourth of these rare moments yesterday, and probably the most significant one to date.  It brought me to tears.  I’d sort of got into my mind that I just needed to cross my t’s and dot my i’s in order to fulfill an internship and graduate in May with my Master’s.  Pregnant, with a toddler at home, my only goal at this point was to finish my last class and settle down into mommyhood for, well for as long as I could see.  And I’m still going to do that to a degree, but this professor, my beloved professor, who is what I want to be when I grow up :-), she set me aside and had this talk with me, and not only had this talk with me, but committed to walk with me along the journey.  I hope to share more later, as the semester goes on, but I left her office and walked around campus, just shaking my head and marveling at God.  “Why?  Why me?  Why are you so good to me?”  My dreams and vision are so small, so limited, and His is so vast, so beautiful.  His dreams are so much bigger than me, and yet He lets me play a part in the beautiful production.  I feel like after a long season of disappointments, God is beginning to put some pieces into place, pieces that take all the brokenness, and miraculously form them into a beautiful picture that only He could have fathomed.

What I take from this, and what I hope you will hear, is this:  We will never know how much our words mean to others, especially those who look up to us (and you never know who looks up to you!).   I’ve also had a few conversations that were devastating.  I had one last year that almost made me never want to share my heart for ministry again.  But yesterday I did, for the first time since that discouraging conversation, and risked again being vulnerable.  And I will tuck yesterday’s conversation away in my heart, to cherish and remember during times of discouragement, just as I have the others along the way that have so shaped my life.

Please hear this:  What you say to others can change the course of history.  Speak life!  Speak encouragment. And if we are in a position of authority, don’t be threatened by those underneath!  It is our responsiblity as leaders, parents, teachers, mentors, to raise up the younger generation.  Our goal is that they would be better, smarter, and more influential than we are.  If our goal is simply to protect our status, to guard our carefully constructed identity, we will miss out on raising up the next generation of leaders who will change our world for Christ.  As a youngster, who has just received one of the most encouraging talks of my life, I can attest to the fact that being believed in is one of the most powerful things in the world.    I pray that we would look for ways to encourage, build up, and call out the valuable gifts we see in others.  You never know how God might use your words, and who He might raise up in the process.  And don’t forget to thank those along the way who have believed in you.