Every so often Dutch gets a treat–a sleepover at Papa & Oma’s house.  As I have had a ton to do getting ready for our first Women’s Bible study and moving (and both of those things happening on the same day!), we decided it’d be a perfect time for Dutch to enjoy such a sleepover tonight, freeing me up tomorrow morning to run some errands and catch up on things.  So tonight, with Jeff away at high school group, Heidi and I enjoyed a quiet–very quiet–evening at home.  We took the opportunity to visit some girls, a couple friends of mine who have each given birth to baby girls in the past month, and savored the chance to actually have a full conversation without answering a dozen questions about trucks in between sentences.

We cleaned the house, packed boxes, paid bills.  We went for a walk to our new house (which is painted, I might add!), and as I walked back I was relishing the chance to actually think, that is lose myself in a train of thought, when I realized that that is truly rare.  Even on our daily walks I am usually in a continual ongoing conversation of answering questions:  “What’s that moon doing?  I want touch the big brick wall!  Where’s the cows?  What’s that guy doing?  Our house is all done!  Where’s the work guys go?  What’s that truck?  What’s Lightning McQueen say?  What’s Big Red say?  What’s Heidi doing?”  So, tonight was a rare, I could just think.

And then tonight, I tucked Heidi into bed.  Being the girl that she is, she smiled, stuck her thumb in her mouth and promptly fell asleep. No, “It’s not bedtime! It’s not bedtime!  I want Mama lay. I want Mama lay!  I want read ano’ book.  I need juice.  I need my blanket!”  No collapsing onto the couch exhausted.  I looked around the house. It was clean.  Strikingly clean.  And this verse came to mind:

Proverbs 14:4, “Where no oxen are, the trough is clean;
But much increase comes by the strength of an ox.”

Does that seem odd?  Well my New Kari Translation is this:  “Where no Dutch is; the house is clean; but much joy and fruit comes by the flurry of a son.”

The truth is that my Dutch boy brings me challenges beyond what I ever imagined. He has more energy than I ever thought possible. He is creative beyond measure, which means he can think of an infinite number of questions each day, which are all directed at me.  He has the will of steel, which I pray each day for the grace to break and bring into subjection to God’s ways.  I feel like it takes limitless energy to constantly direct, correct, applaud, answer, respond, rebuke, encourage, affirm.  And each night, as I quietly close the door of his bedroom, I shake my head in wonder at how much energy it takes to raise this little son of ours.

But I’d never want it any other way.  How thankful I am for our little son.  The trough may be clean, but a clean trough isn’t my life’s aim.  It is to give all that I have (and give it I do!) to help our son grow in the knowledge of God, to train him in godliness, to love him ferociously.  So while tonight I’m enjoying a peaceful break, I’m thankful for the work that my little ox brings my way.  I love you, Dutcher.

2 thoughts on “A Clean Trough”

  1. Oh my, this is exactly how I feel with Hudson right now! I collapse onto the couch EXHAUSTED every evening, so thankful he’s in bed. But by the time morning comes I’m looking at his door and waiting to hear his little voice. Every day is a roller coaster, every day takes every ounce of energy, intelligence and creativity that I possess–and Hudson is worth every little bit. I’ve never done anything that challenges me as much as being Hudson’s mommy, but I’ve also never had so much fun. Whew.
    Kari, just imagine how strong, how smart, how resourceful, how creative, how wise we will be when our children are grown! They are making us into such better people. 🙂

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