I don't like change. I like having changed.

You’d think after doing this 13 times I would have figured this out:

Moving is hard.

I hadn’t anticipated this one being hard. I mean, we’ve moved across states, moved with less than a few day’s notice, moved into other people’s houses (with them not living there), moved into other people’s houses (with them living there!), moved into a windowless cave and a creepy dive apartment, and even moved just a few weeks after giving birth to our babygirl.

In other words, I kind of get the moving thing.

But, for whatever reason, this one knocked the wind out of me. We hadn’t been in the house but a few minutes when Heidi cruised around the corner and cracked her head on countertop.

And then we all basically spent our whole first week bumping into stuff. We bumped into each other as we learned to house-share, kitchen-share, bathroom-share, as we tried (and failed) to give each other grace and exercise patience and why did it take all my energy just to get our family to function on the most basic level??

But, as any rationally-minded person could have predicted, exactly a week into life at our new house, we finally found our groove.  The kids finally remembered where the bathroom was in the middle of the night. I finally found that one box I’d been looking for. We finally figured out how to take a shower in our funny claw-foot tub.  And by God’s grace, on that week-anniversary of life in our home, we all gave a collective sigh and said, Ahh…we’re home. 

It just takes time.

This last weekend, I joined a dear group of women for a retreat entitled Changed. I’d never thought about the fact that the title is changed, past tense. I’ve always been passionate about being changed. I’m writing a book right now that’s passionately pleading with women to embrace the holy revolution for ordinary days, the sacred mundane way of life that produces a changed life from the inside out. But, like many things, I like the past tense form and not so much the present.

I don’t like change. I like having changed. 

Do I love writing? I love having written. Do I love speaking? I love having spoken. Do I love running? I love having run. 

Isn’t that the truth with almost anything worthwhile?  I love having changed. I love when I can look back and truly see that God has made me new. He’s transformed my heart and habits. He’s filed away my rough edges and made me more like His Son.

But I don’t necessarily like the present-tense part. Change. I don’t like the part where I’m running into things, where I can’t figure out my routine and where it takes all my energy just to function on the most basic level.

But I, we, have to remember: it just takes time.

Whatever resolutions you have made for 2013, whatever changes you’re earnestly attempting, you may be in the season right now where you’re just bumping around. Knocking your head on the countertop and trying to figure out just how to take a shower. It takes an enormous amount of energy to establish new habits. And I pray that however frustrated you may feel–keep on keeping on. Keep getting up to read God’s Word. Keep making healthy choices for your body. Keep getting down on your knees in prayer. Keep loving that person who challenges you so much.

Keep on making those new grooves, beating down those new paths so your feet will eventually go that way without a thought. It just takes time. And in the meantime, in the struggle, we need extra doses of grace. 

Grace from God that fills all the gaps and gives us the courage to keep going. 

Here’s to grace for you this week as you keep on keeping on. Thanks for reading.