Running Back and Forth: The Balancing Act of a Ministry-Mommy

Ahhhh…it’ s 7:30pm, that perfect time of day.  We’re out at RiverSong for the weekend, and I just tucked my two little wonders into bed.  It’s been a long and wonderfully exhausting day, the end of a long and wonderfully exhausting week.  Prepping to lead an all-day women’s leadership retreat today, hosting out of town family, celebrating Jeff’s birthday, studying/preparing/teaching the High Schoolers, toting the kids to a rehearsal dinner, finishing up doing some pre-marital counseling, juggling several doctor’s apppointments, braving my monthly grocery run with kids in tow, and preparing all the food myself for the retreat (so I wouldn’t break my silly grocery budget that I made the mistake of telling all of you about!), this week was full of both ministry and mommy commitments.  Now before you start commenting on how I need margin and boundaries in my life, I promise that I do.  This is not the norm for us; we really don’t overbook, but sometimes things just all happen to fall on the same week and there’s nothing you can do about it, you know?  What was I going to do, cancel Jeff’s birthday?   No, I did cut out some other things and it was actually a fabulous faith-building week as I watched God organize, arrange, and re-arrange my schedule so that everything fit into place.  The divine juggle.  (And my calendar this week is virtually empty, I promise.)

But speaking of the juggle, today was a very clear picture to me of what that juggle looks like.  My shift as mommy started this morning at 6:30am–bright and early since we’re away from home–when Dutch shuffled out of his room in his dinosaur jammies with a big smile and “Good morning!”  I had been up since 5am finishing up last minute prep for our leadership retreat today, so he snuggled next to me while I finished my studying, then I got dressed and ready while he had conversations with his lizards in the bathtub.  Then toweling off, getting dressed, and downstairs for the day.

While oatmeal cooked on the stove, I turned to the other side of the kitchen and tossed the salad for our retreat lunch.  Back and forth I went: Stir the oatmeal … scurry across the kitchen … chop carrots … dish up the oatmeal … sprinkle feta … blow on the oatmeal that’s too hot mommy it’s burning my tongue… slice the bread for the lunch … fill up the sippy cup … load up all the food in the cooler for the leadership retreat.  Answer the phone (we’re staying at my parent’s house while Jeff’s back home with his own ministry commitments), hold the phone in the crook of my neck while rinsing salad bowls. My sweet Jeff is sharing grand and godly advice about leadership and I’m chuckling to myself because he is talking about being filled with the Spirit and I tell him I am up to my elbows in dishwater while Heidi hangs on my legs.  Don’t get me wrong–I agreed with what he was saying, I just had to laugh because in the moment being Spirit-filled means letting God give me the grace to still give Heidi blow-bellies on the floor even though I know I have a ton to do and exactly 13 minutes before the retreat ladies arrive at the cabin next door.  Of course it all worked out.  In fact, it was fun to hear from other moms who came to the retreat–they all had tales of hurrying home for sports tournaments, overnight birthday party sleepovers, hosting ministry events in their homes, preparing for family vacations.  When it was time to calendar out the 2010-2011 mininstry year schedule, iphones popped out and eyes narrowed at the screens as we juggled ministry meetings and swim lessons and husbands’ work schedules.   I’m certainly not alone in this balancing act.

But a little nugget of scripture wowed me afresh this morning, as I finished my prep for the retreat, and as I thought of this balancing act that is the life of a ministry-mommy.  Like I said, we all do it.  That’s why God gave us hips.  We hold a baby on a hip while counseling someone over the phone, stirring dinner, mouthing “no” to a toddler sneaking a cookie, and then somehow picking up dirty laundry with our toes (or am I the only one who does that?).  We often occupy two worlds.  In my closet I have my “magic” jacket.  It’s long and cute so no matter what I’m wearing at home–filthy t-shirt, covered in snot and spaghetti sauce–I can throw on that coat, pull back the hair in a power pony-tail and walk into the church office in some semblance of a sane woman.   I love that coat… The coat is this really beautiful blue and the sleeves are puff…  oops, sorry, enough about the coat. The Scripture–that’s what wowed me this morning.  This is what it says of David.  David was the shepherd boy, tending his father’s flocks, but he was then anointed and proclaimed to be the future king of Israel.  He is then called into the service of Saul, the current king of Israel, so he serves Saul there in the king’s service, and stands with the army who is facing the Philistines in the valley of Elah.  But this is what is said of him, during that season:

“David went back and forth from Saul to feed his father’s sheep at Bethlehem.” 1 Samuel 17:15

I know, not the live-changing prayer-of-Jabez verse of the century, but this just struck me this morning. David has been anointed the future king of Israel, he’s been called into the current king’s service. But, you know, somebody still has to take care of dad’s sheep!  And David remains faithful to that responsibility, tending his father’s sheep.  And he runs back and forth, balancing both worlds.

Now I’ve been to the Valley of Elah, where this is taking place, and I’ve been to Bethlehem.  We drove a bus between the two places.  We’re not talking a quick 2 minute zip in my Pilot over to the church office.  This is a long run.  And he did this, day after day, remaining faithful to both responsibilities.  He must have gotten tired too.

Of course that was just for a season … just like being the mom of young children.  I love this season, and although in some ways I’d love to just snuggle up with them and do nothing but read shark books and give blow bellies, I also know that for this season God has called me to do some juggling, just as so many of you moms are doing as well.  And I get tired. And you do too.  But David did too.  And while I do struggle with knowing  whether or not I’m doing the right thing–taking time to lead and study and teach–God’s revealed that these are my marching orders for this year, and his marching orders are always the best.  Besides, I’m trusting that as I study and steep myself in God’s Word and ministry, and do so with joy and grace and balance, that Lord willing my children might just see and want to know what’s so captivating about this God of the Bible.  When I was little my mom led Bible study.  Because I watched her, I always had pretend Bible studies, lining up my dolls around me and reading them the Bible, which I held upside down as I babbled make-believe verses.  I think I even wore pretend glasses.

So I will continue to run back and forth. At least for this season.  My family is absolutely first, but I’m thankful also for the privilege of serving God in ministry to women as well.  And for all of you, who juggle kids and wear numerous hats and perhaps have your own “magic coat” for those needed quick transitions, I pray for grace and strength, to run back and forth with joy.