I was up early this morning. My eyes popped open, as if I’d just blinked last night instead of slept,  and thoughts still full of last night’s message.  Last night was our March Adorn, our monthly time for women of our church to get together, hear a speaker, enjoy some treats, and get to know each other. We set up the room in 14 little “living rooms”, 6 people in each, with couches, chairs, lamps, candles, flowers, and harp music in the background.  People must have been praying because from the moment women began to arrive, it seemed that God’s Spirit was just on our time in a special way.

The topic was The Influential Woman.  Becky Doel, a seasoned, wise woman of God, spoke, and I felt like a sponge, on the edge of my seat, wishing I could somehow physically take her words and tuck them into my heart and soul, make them my own, make them work in me that things God’s done in her.

Her words were simple.  She’s the first to announce her influence comes not from degrees or prestigious job titles.  She is “only” a wife and mother. She’s homeschooled her children, loved her husband, and biblically influenced the women around her. She has embodied Titus 2:

“Older women likewise are to be reverence in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled… so that in everything they may adorn the doctrine of God our Savior.”

Women, this is our job description.  All of us. I think so often I make influence, mentoring, discipling, whatever you choose to call it, too complicated.  One thing I loved was that Becky thinks there is an “older woman” and a “younger woman” in all of us.  We can all learn from each other.  But those with the life experience of walking with Christ need to share with the younger women around, teaching them.  And what are they to teach them?  How to love their husbands and children, how to be self-controlled and pure, how to work at home and put their time and attention there, how to be kind, how to submissive to their own husbands.  So that God’s Word would not only not be reviled, but that it would be adorned, adorned by our beautiful lives, made attractive to the world by our pure conduct and by our love.  Women, that’s what we’re called to do.

As a young woman, I can vouch for the fact that we younger women are hungry, starving for godly mentors.  I wanted to climb into Becky’s purse and have her take me home so I could learn everything she had to offer.  Older women, please know we want to learn from you.  Becky admitted she feels insecure, especially around some of us younger women who are educated, “accomplished”, confident in speaking, etc.  She feels like she’s not sure of what she has to offer. Hogwash!  Good grief, older ladies, you have so much to offer.  Those of us who have been married 7 years want to hear from you who have been married 37 years.  Those of us with 3-year-olds want to hear from you with 30-year-olds. My mom knows this, she is (as a wise mother/mother-in-law should be) always cautious of giving advice, so I usually have to beg her to give me wisdom, twist her arm to tell me what I should do! 🙂 As I write that though, I realize that is one of the things that makes her so attractive.  We’ve all been around women who are so eager to tell you their advice (I can be one of these obnoxious sorts), you leave wanting to do exactly the opposite of what they said.  God’s influential women listen, support, care, empathize… and share the godly wisdom and counsel that God has laid on their hearts.

I for one am praying and pleading with God to raise up the older generation of women to be pillars of wisdom and beauty in God’s house, strengthening the younger women, encouraging, exhorting, praying for, believing in.  Though it’s always been a passion of mine to be an influential woman, I was so inspired last night to, Lord willing, help empower those older influential women around me.  We’re calling you, we love you, and we need you.

Please share with us. Please reach out to us.  We’re listening.

One thought on “The Influential Woman”

  1. Kari, thank you for the kind words you showered me with in your blog. My door is always open to you and I will always make time to encourage younger women in the Lord. My heart was filled with a deeper love for God last Thursday night as He did an amazing work through one of His children. May He get all the praise! Thanking you for your leadership towards the women of Willamette and all that know you. You are an influential woman!!!!

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