8 words you may need today

{This story is from a couple years ago but this week I’m getting new opportunities to put these words into use. Perhaps you might try them as well?}

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I was wrong, please will you forgive me?

The eight most important words for preserving the life of a relationship.  I’ve said them countless times to my husband, a number of times to my friends, and a handful of precious times to my children.

Yesterday was one of those times.

Call it spiritual attack. Call it hormones. Call it 10 house-showings in 10 days. Call it Bible-study-starts-in-5-days-and-I’m-teaching. Call it trying-to-write-a-book-and-raise-preschoolers-at-the-same-time. Call it 5 stubborn pounds I can’t seem to shed. Whatever reasons there are, the flesh is the flesh and sin is sin and when my bright-eyed, bushy-tailed 4-year-old came down the stairs that morning his mama was in tears and that’s just how the day began.

Please tell me you’ve begun a day like that too?

The morning carried on and I’m pleased to say I kept the barking to a minimum.  Heidi had apparently caught the same grouch-bug as me, so we were quite the couple. The only difference between her and I was that I’ve only slightly risen above throwing myself on the floor and pitching a fit (but I thought about it).  So by the time we were late out the door and I was still packing snacks and brushing my teeth (at the same time) and Heidi was still in her jammies, I scurried them into the car and asked them both, in that lovely barking voice sadly reserved for those I love the most, “Will you please not talk right now?!”

I knew as soon as I said it that it was sin — anger. Words that force faces down, words that push away instead of invite. But what was really unfair was that Dutch had been a prince. He had helped Heidi in the car, gotten her books, picked up her fallen toy, tried to comfort her — and when I had huffed and barked, he had sat quietly.

His maturity shamed me.

The thought actually flashed through my mind, “He’s acting more godly than I am right now.”  I thought back to a conversation we had had — because he’s always asking, “Who knows more, Daddy or Papa? Who knows more, you or Daddy? Do I know more than Heidi?” He’s very interested in who knows more, so I had explained to him that true knowledge isn’t in knowing facts or things but in knowing God, in being humble and wise and acting in obedience to God. We read Jeremiah 9:23-24,

²³ This is what the LORD says:

“Let not the wise boast of their wisdom
or the strong boast of their strength
or the rich boast of their riches,
²⁴ but let the one who boasts boast about this:
that they have the understanding to know me,
that I am the LORD, who exercises kindness,
justice and righteousness on earth,
for in these I delight,”
declares the LORD.

So as we continued down the road, my heart pricked with conviction, of course I turned and spoke those seven words to my children:

“Mommy was wrong. I’m sorry for being harsh and impatient and not speaking kindly to you. Will you please forgive me?”

Dutch’s face lit up, his authentic smile spread from ear to ear.  He beamed at me and said,  ”Yes, Mommy! I forgive you! I will always forgive you. I love you.”

And then, in a soft, quiet voice, spoken with respect and a shy smile he said, ”For a while there it was like I knew a little bit more than you.”

How could I not smile at that?

I reached back and took his hand in mine. “Yes, baby boy.  I’m so pleased with how you’re learning to trust God and obey Him. Sometimes you even teach mama how to do it too…”

Repentance restores relationships.

Forgiveness heals those hairline fractures we cause with our carelessness each day. 

Perhaps write them down — these 8 words — and have them handy. You may need them this week. Perhaps even today...   {Thanks for reading.}

*Thanks to Nadene for creating this graphic!